My new reality
by yukikosnow139
Summary: This is a one-shot told in izaya's point of veiw. It tells his story up in till the end of middle school. It explains why he is a sociopath. AN: He has an older brother. AU


**This is my edited version because my original was really bad, I typed it all at 3 in the morning. This is also Slightly AU because Izaya has an older brother.**

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My new reality

A long time ago my family was a

normal one, or maybe in my toddler mind we were normal. I can not remember many of my childhood memory, but from what I can remember my father, Mother, brother, and I were happy. But as I look back onto them I realized there was always that underline tension. I also have hazy memories which I rather forget. I know my brother can rember so much more then I can, probably because he was older then me. My parents divorced when I was around five to six, again my memory is hazy so I can not remember the exact age. I, in my little years, always wondered why my parents were living sepertly. I do not remember what they told me but I knew at some point I excepted it. My mother lived just five minutes away. I can remember her telling me stories, I know some of them made me feel sad and cry. When my mother asked why I said I felt bad for the charater. my mom would say they were okay and comfort me.

When I was seven my dog died and I cried and cried. I know my brother did too, but he just didn't show it. I don't remember how we got though it, but we did. At that time my brother was getting ready to graduate grade school. My parents not wanting me and my brother be separated, I was forced to change schools. At that time my mother was dating a man and he had a daughter that was a year older than my brother. We moved into a house half way across the island and I went to an elementary across the way, while my brother went to the middle school. The daughter of the man my mother was dating went to a very good private school. I know I was bullied by my classmates. I remember one day I was so fed up I punch the wall above the girls head and I claimed there was a bug and I was getting it. I know I never really told anyone about the bullying. I have a memory of when me and my brother and I would have to ask people for quarters to catch the bus home. Now I know we weren't poor it would just be my brother had to pick me up and didn't have enough money.

I remember wanting to change schools so I did. For fourth grade I went to a different school and I was being bullied again. I don't remember much of that year only I had only 2 friends.

For fifth and sixth grade I went back to my old elementary, the one that was the very original school. My brother entered high school. I can't remember exactly what year I stayed home and didn't go to school, because again of bullying. I know at more then one point I wanted to kill my self. I also know at one point I cut myself. Eventually I was forced to go back to school. The bullying stop a lot.

For my middle school days I got into the school of my choice and got to learn how to play the violin. I was only a little bullied. I also noticed I had trouble connecting with other people, especially boys my own age. While they were into sports and girls I was into not being noticed and forgotten. I was loud but it was only to put people off from getting to close.

I think you should all know I was not a timid person in less in front of a stranger but I would always soon be my loud crazy self. Maybe it was that reason I was constant picked on. Just because I was different from what other kids and girls my age were like. I liked darker colors than lighter, night to dark, moon to sun, horror to romance. I also never really showed I was being bullied. I always wore my happy-go-lucky smile. I never said anything because I felt I didn't need to be worried about I was the one who needed to worry for others. Maybe it was also the fact that I Never really liked the things other people especially the boys my age liked, that I never really connected with them.

I now close myself off to reality by sleeping. Just trying to get away from life and all the misery. I am thankful for everything given to me but I can't help but hate reality. Again I think about killing myself but I feel it would disrespect my parents because they brought me into this world, so now dreams are my reality.

Goodbye,

Bittersweet reality


End file.
